Silly Rabbit

Silly Rabbit
to the tune of 'Live Forever'
by Oasis



(fade in on Trix Rabbit in drag confronting kids in front of a minivan parked on the curb)

Hey, kids! I'm your friendly meter maid
And you underpaid.
You could pay me with some Trix.
Wait, kids. Don't give in to fear and doubt
When my ears pop out
God, I really need a fix.

The best breakfast that I've seen
Or'ngey or'nge and limey green
There is nothing I won't do
For you kids' wildberry blue
But you put me on the skids
You say Trix are just for kids
And I'm nothing but a silly Rabbit...

I said, Hey, kids!
I've been waiting in the park
Out here in the dark
For you guys to happen by
Wait kids! It's not creepy in the least
No need for police
...Give it here, and no one dies.

Now you run, oh that's just great
I will never eat at this rate.
You ask why I'm up in arms
It's revenge for Lucky Charms
Oh, I steal? Well you do too,
And plus I'm taller than you.
Why am I just the silly Rabbit?

(Scooby-Doo style chase around park as Rabbit tries all kinds of disguises to get the cereal from the kids, while the kids try to find a policeman)

Maybe I'm a cereal criminal
But it's gettin' dull
'cause I just wanna taste
Lately I've been pickin' up my checks
And no one suspects
That I might purchase a box.

Finally I get to try
Some new Trix that aren't a lie
Here we go, and not too soon
Chomping down on milk and spoon
What the hell, this tastes like shit
All these years, and this is it?
I don't want it now that I have it...
I'm such a silly rabbit...
Such a silly rabbit...
Such a silly rabbit...
Such a silly rabbit...
Such a silly rabbit...
Such a silly rabbit...

(final instrumental is police showing up as Rabbit destroys Trix display in anger, kids point him out in a lineup and Rabbit is carted off to jail where other cartoon cereal mascots are also imprisoned, including the Cookie Crisp Crook, Sonny the Cuckoo, Lucky, Barney Rubble and other enemies of breakfasting children everywhere. Close on shot of Rabbit in cell as meal is slid under the door...and it's a bowl of Trix.)